Believe In Life ~ Part Three

[7wildwaysup]

Title: Believe In Life …
Story Type: AU
Word Count: 3158
Rating: R, Porn…
Warnings: Passion and Lust…
Banner: TV_Fan_2008
Beta Queen:   Bigj52 

Summary:  Honey I’m Home… Porn… Porn… Porn

Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, plot, etc. are property of their respective owners, including, but not limited to Russell T. Davies, Cowlip, and Showtime. The author of this story is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended…

 

Believe In Life…    ♥♥♥

Part Three ~ Holding On Tight…

Justin’s POV

It’s Thursday night and I took the train into town, it’s a lot cheaper than flying, but takes longer. It’s about eleven thirty when I get to the loft. It looks dark and I wonder if he’s still out. I think I’ll get some sleep while I wait for him. I pull back the loft door and the only light on is the one over the island, turned down low. I go to set my bag down in the bedroom and stop suddenly in the doorway when I see him sleeping on the bed. He’s still clothed but he’s pulled the duvet up over him and he seems to be clutching a little red pillow. He looks sad, his eyes look swollen and his face is a little puffy. Then I realize that he’s been crying.

I sit down on the bed and lean into him, running my fingers through his hair. Upon closer inspection I notice that he’s holding my old long sleeved red t-shirt. It’s still half tucked into a ziploc bag and I think the last time I remember seeing it was back when I was with Ethan. Well, when he confronted me about Ethan. I can’t believe he’s kept that shirt with so many bad memories attached to it. I reach down and take it out of his hands and slip it back into the bag, but I smell it first and then I know why he’s kept it. It smells like me, him, us, and it smells like sex, our sex… Oh God, that is so sweet… I ziploc it up and set it in the closet. He’ll know I know, but we don’t have to talk about it.

I crawl back into bed and he naturally curls up into me, holding me tight. I wrap my arms around him and hear his breathing relax as he falls into a deeper sleep. I lay there for the next hour or two and try to figure out how to make all this work out. Because we’re in need of an intervention or my boyfriend is going to fall into the abyss. I know there’s something deeper than my absence at play here; I can see that it was just the catalyst for what is happening. But he’s so private he won’t talk to me about what it is and I can only guess he’s finally dealing with the stress of Gus’s custody and his childhood demons. I’ve been dealing with my own demons lately and I know I need him to help me focus on my art, otherwise there’s no point in me being in New York.

I feel him start to stir as the sun comes up over the skyline; he slept all night with his head on my belly with me caressing his back. I think it might be the first relaxing sleep he’s had since I’ve left, I know it is for me. I can tell at first he’s confused, doesn’t know if it’s me. Besides, I’m usually the one with my head on his stomach, drooling. Then I feel him run his hand across my chest, whispering ‘so beautiful’… 

He starts licking and sucking his way down to my navel, tickling me with his tongue as he sucks on the little nub of my outie belly button. Yes, it’s true, I have an outie. I’m wiggling, trying to make him stop. It’s one of those places that drive me totally insane and the only person that knows about it is him. “Brian! Please! Stop!” He obliges me and moves on, snuggling his face in my bush, inhaling my essence. Of course I have a raging hard-on now from all his fondling and I can’t help oozing a little as his lips caress my slit. I moan and arch my back, giving him more as he opens his mouth and takes me inside.

I was sure he was going to tease me to death, but I think he realizes that I’d probably just shoot all over him if he didn’t start blowing me in earnest. Oh God, I have missed this! Missed him, his touch. I feel like my nerve endings are just starting to smoke and spark, soon igniting a blazing fire. He’s relentless, taking me down his throat hard and fast and I’m not going to last. I can’t focus, my head is flailing back and forth on the pillow and I’m screaming his name out loud. Just feeling the silky warmth of his cheeks and throat as I glide in and out is driving me crazy. Then he swishes his tongue across my slit and I’m lost in heaven, seeing stars.

I haven’t even caught my breath when I feel him pull my legs up onto his shoulders and then the cool gel circling my rosebud just before be plunges two fingers into me, stroking my prostate and stretching me open for him. I don’t remember hearing the condom wrapper tearing open but then again I’m already on the launch pad as he prepares to thrust his rocket into my deep space. Just feeling his head bumping my pucker, starting to enter my slick canal is amazing. He thrusts in good and hard, engulfing himself all the way, claiming me. He feels so big but I know it’s because it’s been weeks since we fucked. Once he feels me relax he starts to take me tenderly. I hear him chanting; “So good, so tight.” He’s trying so hard to make it last but it’s been too long since we were together and I don’t think he has much stamina but don’t tell him.

He’s moaning softly into my ear as he rests his head on my shoulder, sucking my neck. Our bodies move in sync with one another as he increases his rhythm and speed. I feel his breathing growing rapid and his hands come down to hold my hips firmly to the mattress as he pounds himself into my ass, hitting my prostate on each thrust. I reach down and start jerking myself off until I’m floating in the Milky Way as he circles the moon. I’m so close again I know I’ll be shooting stars any minute just like the sun will be erupting soon after, leaving nothing but the brightest white lightning across our mind’s eye. We’ve just been apart for too long for either one of us being able to hold out any longer. We blush like teenagers “Fuck! That was hot!” He collapses next to me, pulling me into him as sleep takes us again.

~~~~

Brian wakes to an empty bed; so much for his morning woody. He sits up, panicking, wondering if it was all a dream. He’s still groggy with sleep. It’s the first time he’s actually slept in a long time, but he can’t shake this eerie feeling like everything’s about to change and it scares the hell out of him. Then he smells the strong French roast drifting in from the kitchen. He gets up to an empty loft and gets a cup of coffee, noticing a note from Justin. “Went to the grocery store to get some food, we need to talk after breakfast.”  There it was - those dreaded words that every man fears hearing. He just hoped that it might have taken longer. But it’s probably better this way; just rip the band-aid off fast, no matter how much it stings.

I pull the door back, startling Brian from his internal rant, but I see it in his eyes something’s changed; he’s putting up his walls. Brian takes one of the bags and we set them down by the fridge. I turn and stand real close to him, wrapping my arms around his neck as he leans down and kisses me. Once our lips touch I have him again. He’s still half asleep. I climb his body and wrap my legs around his waist, grinding myself into him. I’m kissing him everywhere and he’s following suit, both of us getting so turned on as he sets me on the counter and starts removing all my clothes. I whisper how much I’ve missed him, love him, need him, want him… He just keeps kissing me like I’m some kind of life line, like if I break contact he’ll no longer exist.

He pushes me down on the counter holding my arms above my head as he nips and bites my neck and shoulders. Then he licks the same spots, tickling me as he starts running kisses down and around my chest. The only article of clothing I have left on is my wool scarf that he uses to ties my hands together. I feel so exposed, lying on the kitchen counter, completely naked. I have my legs pulled up in a fetal position as I feel the warmth of his tongue circle and dip into my pucker. This is a pleasure I’ve never had with any other lover. Brian is so loving, so giving that I’m writhing and rocking, trying to take more of him but he’s taking his time, driving me crazy. I feel the vibrations from him chuckling at me as I wiggle and beg; he finally pushes his tongue deeper, past my tight ring of muscles, swishing and swaying against my slippery walls.

I’m panting, moaning as he pulls me tighter to him, taking himself deeper into me. I want to jerk off but I can’t, I’m restrained. My body is humming and I feel like I’m going to burst. I feel his warm, wet tongue flick then nudge, finally pushing deeper as his tongue lightly feathers against my prostate. I explode, shooting across my chest; now it’s running down the sides of my neck. He just looks up and asks; “Better now, Sunshine?” Cum has pooled around the back of my neck, in my hair and splashed across my chin. He says; “Don’t move” then he’s gone. He gets his camera and takes a picture of me. What the fuck…? Now he’s back as he leans in and licks my chin, cleaning it off before he kisses me, while at the same time he unties my wrists. I tell him; “That was fucking unbelievable…” He says; “Yeah, I know.” I can’t help hitting him across the chest as he pushes us toward the bathroom.

Brian tries to still his fears for the talk that’s to come and decides to give Justin something to remember him by should this be the last time they’re together. He takes a deep breath to calm his nerves; he’s Brian Fucking Kinney, for Christ’s sake and he’s scared of his twink?

I’m totally a sticky mess; it’s hard to believe I could have that much spunk in me. Oh, the hot water feels so good; this is my favorite place to be with Brian, besides our bed. I lean back into him as he soaps me up, running his hands all over my arms, chest, stomach, legs, back and crack. He bends me over and I grasp my ankles; he already has three fingers in me, spreading lube. “Oh God, yes!” I breathe in as I feel him fill me. We fit together perfectly, know each other’s bodies perfectly. I can’t imagine how I thought I could live in another city and leave this behind, No, that’s just not going to work for me.

Brian’s so horny; he’s missed Justin more than he ever knew was possible and having been celibate while he was gone he almost feels like he has the right to claim being a born-again virgin. He loves it when Justin bends over like this, showing him his ass, straight up in the air, wanton and waiting. Brian runs his hands down his spine and aligns his cock with Justin’s quivering rosebud; he rips the condom open and plunges into his blond eliciting cries of passion. He starts out slow, pumping at a steady rhythm as he runs his thumbs over his beautiful round ass, holding him by his hips.

Brian’s completely taken with how beautiful and lithe he is, realising how much he’s missed him. He’s relieved that Justin is facing away and he’s bent in half, facing the floor, so that the shower can easily hide the tears that are streaming down his face. He takes a deep breath and tries to control his thoughts and emotions and just focus on his sweet prince. He pulls Justin in closer, changing his angle as he increases his movements, caressing Justin’s prostate with his cock on each and every stroke. Brian reaches around and slides Justin’s stout prick between his fingers and thumb, working him harder and harder; squeezing and running his thumb across the head, sending spirals of pleasure through him.

It isn’t long before Brian feels Justin’s warm walls grip and release his cock several times before he clamps down and lets his orgasm quake through him, pulling Brian right along with him. Brian feels his climax building, white heat burning through his limbs as he ruts and grinds out his orgasm, wishing he had given into Justin just once about going raw. They’re both moaning out loud with pleasure, trying to catch their breath. Justin’s legs become a little wobbly and Brian holds him close, finally setting him down on the bench while he finishes shampooing his hair and cleaning them up.

Brian starts to dry Justin off with his new oversized thick red towels and Justin thinks it’s sweet that Brian bought new towels for Valentine’s Day. Although he’ll never mention it to Brian he can’t help thinking it’s romantic. Brian reaches down, throws Justin over his shoulder and takes him into the bedroom where he throws him down on the bed then continues drying him off in between kisses. Justin feels so loved. Maddie’s right; when you’re with the one you just feel it right down in your soul, and he does. They just lie there looking into each other’s eyes, where their love and admiration for each other is clearly evident.

They dress and come back out into the kitchen; Justin’s starving, having missed dinner while on the train last night. He asks if Brian wants an egg-white omelet with feta cheese and spinach. Brian’s nervously trying to read the paper, he’s pacing and looks slightly panicked. Justin looks up at him and for the first time realizes that Brian’s really upset, way more than before. He goes to him and brings him back to sit at the counter, pouring him some orange juice and more coffee. He runs his hand through his hair and kisses his temple, telling him to relax; he’s right here. Whatever it is he can tell him. Justin thinks this is about his father and he wants to be as supportive as possible. Brian asks if they can just wait until after breakfast. Justin looks at him and asks if he can wait that long because he looks like he’s about to stroke out.

Silence…

Once we finish breakfast I sit him down to have a talk, one that we should have had before I left. But he’s not the easiest man to communicate with; I start and he says; “Please don’t… I know what you’re here to tell me and I really don’t think I can hear it right now.”

 His voice cracks and he says, “It’s okay, I understand. I always knew how this would play out. Don’t be sorry or sad, just know that I loved you, and when you look back at our time together I just hope you’ll remember some of the good times as well. I’m so sorry for the way I treated you, you never deserved that. I’m really an asshole! Thank God, now you’ll be free of me and able to find someone that you can really love.”

“Brian… That was really quite a dramatic little speech for a man that never shows his emotions. Now, if you wouldn’t mind I’d like to continue where I left off before you decided to queen out on me… I’ve spent the last few weeks in New York and I won’t tell you that it’s not exciting, but it’s also not home. It will never be my home. I’m lucky to have met Maddie and I feel like maybe that was the reason that I was meant to go to New York. I just feel like she will always be a part of my life - my family from now on and I can’t wait for you to meet her.”

“Maddie knows lots of influential people in the business and the art world. She’s offered me a place to stay when I’m in the city, and she’s also enlightened me as to what real love is all about. You see, she was willing to sacrifice everything for the man she loved, nothing could keep them apart; nothing else mattered. It seems that we may have had that part completely backwards.”

Justin looks deep into Brian eyes as he slowly lowers himself into Brian’s lap, “So Mr. Brian Aidan Kinney, there absolutely nothing I want to do more than to marry you. So will you marry me?” 

Brian’s lip quivers as he looks deep into Justin’s eyes, searching for answers, wondering if he is really hearing him correctly. Why would he want to marry me? What is he trying to say? Why would be choose me and not fame and fortune? Justin finally speaks; “Brian? Did you hear me? I asked you to marry me, now, this weekend, just the two of us and I mean, really married. Let’s finally go to Vermont. Let’s finally settle any fears we both have about our future and start living our life to the fullest. I don’t want to spend one more night regretting our throwing everything away, and I don’t think you do either. I may be wrong, but I’m pretty sure you regret this last month as much as I do. And who says we can’t have it all? I say, fuck them, if they can’t take a joke…”

Brian just stares at him, unsure if he heard him correctly. “What?”

 “I believe I just asked you to marry me.” Justin smiles at him and says. “What do you think? Do you want to be Mrs. Justin Taylor?”

He knew that would get a rise out of Brian, as he pushes him down on the sofa and kisses him passionately. When they finally break for air Justin can see the tears running down Brian’s face. He reaches up and wipes them away as Brian says; “I was so sure you were here to end everything, that it was finally over.”

Justin whispers; “Don’t you know it will never be completely over? Never, not even when we’re just dust in the wind.”

TBC…

 

Comments

[sjmpets.livejournal.com]

brian really should give his mind a rest until after her and justin talk. i didn't hear brian say yes, but i sure hope so.

[7wildwaysup.livejournal.com]

He's going to learn how to deal with all the stress from his past and running a major corporation.

He's just going to need a little help and support from his husband and new mother... he he he...

Later Darling ~ Kathleen ♥♥♥

[rainbow1907.livejournal.com]

I feel like my nerve endings are just starting to smoke and spark, soon igniting a blazing fire.
Yes!!! Lots of fire, smoke and spark in this lovely chapter :)))
Thank god at least Justin kept a clear head here what with Brian totally queening out, I felt like Justin should have said "silly twat" to Brian there at the end ;)
Many thanks for the great update, Kathleen!
Hugs you, Rena ♥

[7wildwaysup.livejournal.com]

Yes there was some sparks and smoke in this chapter. I know Brian was queening out but he needs to release some pent up anger and he feels safe with Justin to be able to do that.

I guess I feel like Cowlip never explained his abuse enough, I know it gives him his dark side but I think we need to shine a light on what happened and why he withdrew...

But I promise it won't be to dark, you know me mostly porn, adventures and therapy... he he he...

Later Sweetheart ~ Kathleen ♥♥♥

[rulisteningbj.livejournal.com]

“Don’t you know it will never be completely over? Never, not even when we’re just dust in the wind.”

OMG! That was just perfect writing.

Dee Dee

[7wildwaysup.livejournal.com]

Thanks so much... Just feeling all their passion oozing all over the place...

Later Darling ~ Kathleen ♥♥♥

[pam81.livejournal.com]

So hot and sweet. Great update my dear, thanks =)
Can't wait to read Brian's answer.

[7wildwaysup.livejournal.com]

That was really hot wasn't it... Can't imagine what he wants... he he he...

Later Darling ~ Kathleen ♥♥♥